West Lothian has a new fine dining restaurant called the Water Lily. It is part of The Vu complex which, as the name suggests, enjoys stunning vistas across the Ballencrieff reservoir by Bathgate. The Vu operates as a wedding and conference centre and, judging by the photos on their website, the location makes a striking backdrop for those wedding pics.

I’ve not eaten at or visited The Vu. The food could be fantastic. I don’t know; however, I would gently suggest that the menu in the new restaurant could be improved if its language was toned down a little.

‘Crisp smoked duck and venison salad speared with blood orange and pink grapefruit’ certainly sounds dramatic.

‘Herb crusted rack of lamb carved around garlic cream potatoes smothered in brunoise of vegetables and a light jus-lie’ sounds like a hard to solve murder mystery. Who killed Colonel Lamb? He was smothered with a brunoise in the conservatory.

Flowery menus aside, I hope The Vu does well. We’ve already covered 5pm members that benefit from a good view here. Windows in Glasgow should be added to that list because of its rooftop views and we will mention The Tower again as it’s the subject of a quirky duck-related tale here. It’s a quacker.